My Experience Last Night

It was like any normal night. Except Reagan woke up around 1 am. She's been sleeping through the night so well lately. I dragged myself out of bed, and got up with her. I tried to soothe her with nursing, but seeing as during the day she has zero interest in nursing, I didn't have much to give her. She was bugged, but I managed to get her back to sleep.

I went downstairs and grabbed a bottle and formula, just in case the sleep didn't take for too long. But when I was downstairs, everything was normal.

Sure enough, Reagan woke up again 30 minutes later. I got up again, and this time gave her some formula, and she drifted peacefully off to sleep. I got back in bed. By this point, it was close to 2:30 am.

I finally dozed off again around 2:45 am. This is where it gets weird.

Around 3 am, I awake to my body shaking, almost shivering. But not really shivering. I wasn't cold. I can't describe the feeling, other than it felt like I was being shaken awake from the inside. Truly, the strangest feeling I have ever felt in my life.

I have a hard time opening my eyes, even though I am shaking. In my half awake state, I suddenly realize what's happening, but I don't know why. I open my eyes, but it's just dark. I am a little nervous.

Go turn on the hallway light.

Did I hear that right? I swear someone just said that to me, but it wasn't Matt. He's blissfully unaware of what's going on. So I quickly say a little prayer to help calm me down and figure out what's going on.

Go turn on the hallway light, now.

There it is again. I'm terrified now. I turn on my nightstand light.

No, get up and turn on your hallway light NOW!!

OK! I run, literally run, to the hallway, turn it on and run back into bed. Oh my goodness, what is going on?!? I am thinking.

Suddenly I feel a little bit of calm again. I am sitting in bed, though still terrified and ready to dial 911 at the slightest noise. But I don't ever hear anything.

After sitting in bed for 5 minutes without hardly a single breath, the initial adrenaline is wears off, and I start bawling and wake up Matt to finally tell him what's been going on. Never in my life have I felt something so urgent, so obviously clear that I needed to do something right then. I have no idea why this happened. Or if it changed any path of events that was about to happen to my family, house, or anything like that. Or if simply, I needed to prove something. I will never know. And part of me is grateful for that.

All I know is that I am thankful more today for the Spirit, for a Heavenly Father who clearly watches over me and my family. And I'm glad that even if it took three times, I finally listened to that prompting so I could feel peace again. And all was well last night. I may be more tired, but I am more thankful.